Summer Movie Preview

Summer Movie Preview

Here we are now, entertain us

By Michel Miller 05/22/2014


If for every thing there is a time and a season, then it’s perfectly OK that during the summer months Hollywood doesn’t present us with Oscar hopefuls or critically acclaimed fare — no one expects it, nor do we really want it.  And if the latest round of scorching temperatures is a preview of the months ahead, we probably won’t have the mental capacity to absorb anything too thought provoking anyway, though a few films will tempt us. A tad less exciting than previous years, especially where kids and families are concerned (nothing from Pixar), there’s no shortage of blistering action, tasteless comedy, boobs and brawn. The season kicks off with television’s biggest leading men and ends with some of the most loved and loathed females in entertainment. As unavoidable as the sticky goo on the bottoms of our shoes is the presence of Adam Sandler and Melissa McCarthy. In between there are monsters, mutants, robots, heroes,  villains and excessive use of the word vagina. There are two things everyone has and one of them is an opinion. Ours are colored by a variety of factors and subject to change without notice so take them with a grain of salt, preferably on the edge of a margarita glass. This year we solicited the geekiest among us for extra insight regarding the nerdier fare. We hope you enjoy.


Now playing
PG-13 for intense sequences of destruction, mayhem and creature violence

Given the post-Fukushima climate of fear and uncertainty, the man vs. nature motif has never been more relevant than it is now. With Bryan Cranston in his first feature role since the final episode of perhaps the most-watched television show ever, the Breaking-Godzilla mashups will surely live beyond the run of this film. Cranston may have the Midas touch, but the onus here lands squarely on the special-effects department, which should earn applause from even the most pretentious film majors.


Million Dollar Arm
PG for mild language and some suggestive content
With all the hoopla over Jon Hamm’s meat, Million Dollar Baby Arm might have been considered as an alternate title. (Don’t hate.) The strapping star of Mad Men travels the seven seas in search of the next great baseball pitcher, but as he plays chaperone to his two young recruits, he’s the one who gets a schooling.

May 23
The Angriest Man in Brooklyn
R for language throughout and some sexual content
Robin Williams gets a crash course in anger management when his doctor (Mila Kunis) informs him that an aneurysm has made him a ticking time bomb. When he pressures her to give him a rash prognosis, she blurts out that he has 90 minutes to live. Unfortunately that’s where the premise begins and ends.  Williams goes on a compulsive amends quest, and the rest you can probably figure out. Hollywood never fails to deliver at least one summer movie for the post-12-step, boomer matinee crowd. This is that.

PG-13 for crude and sexual content, and language
Bad Adam Sandler summer movies have become their own genre — even, or perhaps especially, when they are disguised as rom-coms. The addition of Drew Barrymore makes it no more palatable. Not even James Cameron could raise this bar.

X-Men: Days of Future Past
PG- 13 for sequences of intense sci-fi violence and action, some suggestive material, nudity and language

  “Mind officially blown” is what the majority of film critics are saying. But Marvel purists may beg to differ. Director Bryan Singer, who’s already announced X-Men: Apocalypse for 2016, pulls out all the stops for Days of Future Past. Featuring the ultimate mutant ensemble — the cast from all the X-Men movies combined — this could be the best X-Men movie to date. The skinny: Survival of the species hangs in the balance as the X-Men bend time to join forces with their younger selves, rendering botox and butt implants obsolete. Also, and perhaps more importantly, Jennifer Lawrence gets Na’vi by nature in her painted-on blue body suit.


Geek Notes
“The writer/artist team of Chris Claremont and John Byrne on their run of X-Men is considered legendary. Seems like it will try and tie together First Class more than follow the original source material, but there’s a lot of interesting stuff to work from, and the Sentinels could be a memorable threat.”
Tom Franck, Comics and Comics

“The plot seems very complex, which for some raises flags about executing a proper timeline.”
Nick Gonzalez, Main Street Comics

X-Men, if it’s anything like First Class, has the potential to be a good movie, but the last few X-Men movies have left me skeptical.”
Cory Austin, The Armory

“Sentinels. Who isn’t ready for Sentinels?”
— Adam Ellison, The Armory

A Million Ways to Die in the West
R for strong crude and sexual content, language throughout, some violence and drug material

  You say “From the guy who brought you Ted,” like it’s a good thing. Another unwelcome summer movie subgenre that seems as if it’s here to stay is the Western spoof. But this one looks a bit more Animal House than Blazing Saddles and Seth MacFarlane is no Mel Brooks. Obviously inspired by the TV show 1,000 Ways to Die, the story revolves around the dangers inherent in life in the Wild West — especially during the . . . county fair. When wimpy straight man MacFarlane begins drooling over the town’s newest resident (Charlize Theron) he’s challenged to a duel by her swaggering husband (Liam Neeson). Judging by the red band trailer, the script was written for college-age virgin males who can’t get enough of the word vagina. What’s most perplexing is why such high-ranking talent (Neeson, Theron, Sarah Silverman, Neil Patrick Harris, Amanda Seyfried) is willing to list this among its credits. Oh yeah, money.




May 30
Rated PG for sequences of fantasy action and violence, including frightening images
Unsurprisingly, Angelina Jolie beat out Judi Dench and Emma Thompson for the role of the iconic villain who put the curse on Sleeping Beauty.  The back story of Maleficent’s cruel intentions is extrapolated from the Disney fairy tale to potentially fine effect. Though a tad scary for tiny tots, it’s likely to be one of the season’s best in a relatively meager year for family films.

June 6
Edge of Tomorrow
PG-13 for intense sequences of sci-fi action and violence, language and brief suggestive material
In the sci-fi version of Groundhog Day, Tom Cruise is fighting aliens when he gets caught in a “time loop” and is forced to relive the final battle over and over again.  “Live, die, repeat” is the film’s tag line as well as the rope you will want to hang yourself with by the end. That is, unless you need an annual drab Tom Cruise action vehicle to set your watch to.

June 13

22 Jump Street
Not yet rated
In the sequel to, you guessed it, 21 Jump Street, our two underachievers go undercover at a local college. One reconnects with his inner jock, the other finds kindred spirits among the art nerds. There is something equally repulsive and endearing about Jonah Hill, but for reasons too mysterious to explore in these confines, he makes us laugh. This goofball bromedy, also starring Channing Tatum (the Sandra Bullock to Hill’s Melissa McCarthy), looks like it might be a little funny. With the right mix of chemicals and candy — quite so.

How to Train Your Dragon 2
PG for adventure action and some mild rude humor
DreamWorks presents the follow-up to its successful 2010 film about a boy who eschews his dragon-slaying upbringing for a more compassionate and ultimately rewarding alternative. Expect the sequel to break from animation formula in a couple of ways: aging of the characters and a fresh narrative. Forbes magazine has predicted it will be the biggest blockbuster of the season. That may be a stretch but stranger things have happened. There’s no reason, however, not to have high expectations, especially given that DreamWorks used new technology to add nuance and realism to the CGI characters. There’s also no reason not to expect your kids to beg you for a pet dragon when it’s over.

June 20

Jersey Boys
Not yet rated

  Adapted from the Tony award-winning Broadway musical, this Goodfellas-meets-That Thing You Do biopic recalls the highs and lows of pop sensation Franki Valli and the Four Seasons. Originally slated for direction by Jon Favreau, Clint Eastwood took the reins after shelving his stagnant remake of A Star is Born. Another entry for the AARP set, but a much better bet.






June 27
Transformers: Age of Extinction
Not yet rated
Exteme Makeover: Transformers Edition? A fresh cast that includes Mark Wahlberg, Nicola Peltz and John Goodman plus a more polished aesthetic combine to give this blockbuster what’s known in Hollywood-speak as an in-franchise reboot. Director Michael Bay turns up the heat to deliver the movie that everyone’s been wishing for — the movie that might redeem him for the billion-dollar-grossing disaster that was the third movie. He’s had three years to get it right, if getting it right means Grimlock being bitch-slapped by Optimus Prime.

Geek Notes
“The last three Transformers movies have been a mess but financial successes. No reason to expect this one to be any different.”
Tom Franck, Comics and Comics

“Since I was a kid I loved the Dinobots, and as I grew older I knew the day would come where they unleashed their full potential on a bigger scale. And now they’re getting introduced and looking better than ever. This is going to be such an awesome visual experience.”
Nick Gonzalez, Main Street Comics

“Transformers, will be a good action movie, nothing more nothing less.”
Cory Austin, The Armory

“This new film seems to be taking a darker turn in story. It definitely has my interest piqued. Also, I’ll be seeing it for the fact that Dinobots are being introduced.”
Adam Ellison, The Armory

July 2
Deliver Us From Evil
Not yet rated
There is a sexy priest. There is possession. There is a plush owl. What else do you need to know? Based on true accounts from a New York City cop who encountered a whole new level of evil during his time on the force. From the director of Sinister and The Exorcism of Emily Rose. Wear diapers.

Rated R for language, including sexual references
Summer must be Mellissa McCarthy’s color. This year, besides a starring role in another zany comedy, she’s putting a new notch in her belt with co-writing credits alongside her husband, director Ben Falcone. McCarthy’s Tammy is a woman on the rebound in desperate need of a change of scenery. She scoops up her grandmother (Susan Sarandon) and general female mishegas ensues. McCarthy’s lunacy (and bad hair) and Susan Sarandon’s foul-mouthed composure (and equally bad hair) play off each other in classic road movie harmony that seems to take more than a couple of cues from another road movie that starred Sarandon.

July 11
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
Not yet rated

The sequel to 2011’s Rise of the Planet of the Apes is also The Motley Fool’s No. 1 pick for the potentially highest-grossing film of the summer. In this installment, the human survivors of the deadly virus from a decade earlier threaten to usurp the apes’ rule. Once again man and nature face off to determine the planet’s dominant species. Fun fact: Planet of the Apes isn’t just a movie franchise, nor is it merely a pop subculture — it’s now a porn genre. Yes, Erotic Planet of the Apes exists. We’ll wait while you Google it.


Geek Notes
“People liked the trailer more than the film Rise of the Planet of the Apes — an interesting idea executed (somewhat) poorly.  Perhaps this installment will be an improvement.”
Tom Franck, Comics and Comics

“This is the film I’m personally looking forward to the most. As the previous film, Rise of the Planet of the Apes, was an excellent fleshing-out of the back story to the classic sci-fi film. There isn’t a whole lot of connection to the comic-book world, beyond some recent attempts at adaptation that fizzled out, but it’s the rare fan that doesn’t appreciate a fine Planet of the Apes movie!
Mike Sterling, Seth’s Games and Anime/Ralph’s Comic Corner

“I am very excited for this movie. I’m really curious where the story continues. The dynamics between ape and human in the previews have me really curious how the entire story will play out.”
Adam Ellison, The Armory

R for language, including sexual references, and for teen drug and alcohol use
Director Richard Linklater (Dazed and Confused, Waking Life, A Scanner Darkly) provides a fascinating look into the maturation of a young boy in this groundbreaking film that took 12 years to make. Using the same cast — Ellar Contrane, Ethan Hawke, Patricia Arquette — the literal passage of time is beautifully conveyed in Linklater’s signature artistic approach to storytelling. Sure to be one of the more thought provoking entries of the season.

July 18
Jupiter Ascending
Not yet rated

With a release date that falls strategically in between the more hyped-up blockbusters of the same genre, this one may turn out to be the summer’s sci-fi/action sleeper. Mila Kunis is a humble housecleaner who discovers she is actually queen of another planet. (Remember on Trueblood when Sookie found out she was queen of the elves? It’s kind of like that.) Meanwhile, Channing Tatum, looking refreshingly unsexy, swoops in to save the day.



Planes: Fire and Rescue
Not yet rated
Things must be grim for comedian Dane Cook. He’s joined the ranks of Erik Estrada doing animated voice talent for tepid sequels of lame movies. We understand that these movies are more mother’s little helper than legitimate attempts to provide our little ones with quality entertainment, but for the love of all things pure and holy can we come up with something better than sentient machinery? Do we really want an entire generation to believe that not just corporations, but motor vehicles are people too?

The Purge: Anarchy
Not yet rated
Because it wasn’t anarchy in the first film? While voluntary thinning of the species may be the stuff of the Illuminati’s dreams, everybody else is wondering who thought it was a good idea to make a second movie. The sickening premise revolves around a 12-hour period each year when all crime is legal and no emergency services are available (also known as every day in Detroit). Is it survival of the fittest or the smartest? Who will submit to their lower instincts and who will die in order not to? How about a slight plot twist: Every year, for one 12-hour period the people of the United States of America can fire any government employee, including the president, and kill any law that is not beneficial to them as a whole, especially nanny laws. We’ll call it The Purge: Anarchy. Oh, wait.

July 25
Not yet rated

Does Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson as Hercules not seem like a perfect casting decision? The ripped star of Fast & Furious 6, G.I. Joe and Scorpion King spent six months in intensive training to bulk up even more for the role of the mythological son of Zeus as he was imagined in a short comic book series. The story takes place after his legendary 12 labors. Now a mercenary, events lead him to reclaim his true nature. It’s zero to hero and back again for the world’s strongest man.


Magic in the Moonlight
Not yet rated
Hollywood has been reduced to three types of people: those who will always love Woody Allen films, those who will never again watch a Woody Allen film and those who never cared for Woody Allen’s films in the first place. If you fall into the first category, it behooves you to know that he will be releasing a movie this summer, as he has done for years. Continuing his love affair with Europe, this one is set in the 1920s on the French Riviera. It stars Marcia Gay Harding, Emma Stone and Colin Firth. That is literally all we know.

Sex Tape
Not yet rated
What embarrassing feats of sexual prowess will Cameron Diaz perform this year? (Remember her car scene in last year’s The Counselor?) Diaz is most palatable served with comedy, and this one isn’t as bad as the title would suggest. She and her husband (Jason Segal) attempt to add some spice to the bedroom by videotaping themselves engaged in three hours of marital bliss. Unfortunately, a mighty rain falls on their parade when the file automatically uploads to their cloud allowing everyone they know to access it. From the looks of the trailer, the funniest parts concern their failure to comprehend Internet clouds.

Wish I Was Here
Not yet rated
Remember Zach Braff? The Scrubs alumnus who flexed his filmmaking muscles with the indie classic Garden State is back with a project he partially crowd-funded. Regardless of the controversy surrounding wealthy beggars accepting money from humble fans, Braff has a history of doing good work. Early midlife crisis is the territory he’s exploring here — unfulfilled dreams, regret, a dying parent. When he decides not only to home school his kids, but to tailor the curriculum to reflect his quirky sensibilities, his life begins to make sense. Expect a great soundtrack.

Aug. 1
Guardians of the Galaxy
Not yet rated

This film from the makers of the hugely successful Iron Man and Avengers franchises has generated a lot of buzz among nerdy types. The band of heroes featured in this storyline are a scrappier bunch who seem to take themselves with a grain of salt — a refreshing and timely change during the comic-saturated summer market. Cast includes Zoe Saldana, Vin Diesel and John C. Reilly, and a cameo by Stan Lee. Also, one of the Guardians is a raccoon that’s as adorable as Bradley Cooper. That’s probably because it is Bradley Cooper.

Geek Notes
 “That a minor property like this has become a film speaks volumes about how huge comic-book properties are to Hollywood.  Obviously, this film has a more humorous tone than the standard superhero flick.  Maybe the kids will go for it.”
—  Tom Franck, Comics and Comics

“This is going to blow people’s minds. Comics have always had this odd galactic universe that never sees exposure outside of the comics. Avengers introduced the aliens to the superhero movie, and Guardians is going to show us what it can do. And the furry bad mouth is just an extra. No doubt Rocket Raccoon will get the attention he so deserves.”
Nick Gonzalez, Main Street Comics

“There was some hesitance regarding Guardians of the Galaxy at first, primarily along the lines of ‘They’re making a movie of that?’ But the trailer seems to have swayed opinions in a more positive direction. There seems to be very little wrong Marvel can do of late with its films.”
Mike Sterling, Seth’s Games and Anime/Ralph’s Comic Corner

“Yes. Yes. More Yes. A team that isn’t too well-known compared to that of The Avengers. If you do a little research on them, it’s hard not to get excited.”
Adam Ellison, The Armory

Get on Up
Not yet rated
Promising biopic about the hardest-working man in show business, the Godfather of Soul, the man who put the “Uh!” in funk, Soul Brother No. 1. He didn’t know karate but he was quite familiar with c-razy. You get the idea.

Aug. 8
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Not yet rated
Given how low TMNT fan expectations are, anything remotely redeeming about this film will be a bonus. (Yes, reverse psychology is a potent marketing strategy.) The trouble with translating cartoon animals to live action — despite the magic of CGI — is the very real possibility that they will either look like cosplayers, sign spinners or ’70s-era Syd and Marty Krofft characters. Then again, while producer Michael Bay has expressed a desire not to rape the childhoods of die-hard fans, the licensing push suggests a desire to infect a new generation with turtle fever.

Geek Notes
 “There’s been no shortage of fanboy Internet vitriol regarding the re-envisioning of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. There’s definitely a line of people waiting for it to suck.”
Tom Franck, Comics and Comics

“Change their weapons, update their clothes, do what you will, but I am so attached to the original turtle look that this new, more humanoid appearance throws me off. Let’s hope the story can make up for it.”
Nick Gonzalez, Main Street Comics

“From what I saw in the previews it looks like they got the turtles’ attitudes right. Michelangelo is very . . .  Michelangeloish? It reminds me very much of the first live-action movies.”
 — Cory Austin, The Armory

“Long story short, Ninja Turtles runs deep in my veins. There are many childhood photos to prove this. That being said, and with the ever-evident backlash from fanboys with this remake, I’m honestly on the positive side of the fence. “
Adam Ellison, The Armory

Not yet rated
In a role originally offered to Angelina Jolie, Scarlett Johannson plays a woman who is kidnapped and surgically implanted with drugs by smugglers. The drugs leak into her system giving her access to 100 percent of her brain’s capabilities, rendering her superhuman and superpissed and forcing the audience to suspend its disbelief for the next 90 minutes. She turns the tables on her captors and unleashes some vicious revenge. Hell hath no fury.

Into the Storm
Rated PG-13 for sequences of intense destruction and peril, language, including some sexual references
What better way to break up the monotony of beautiful weather than a good old-fashioned disaster movie? This one finds a group of high-school students up-close and personal with a devastating tornado.

Aug. 15
The Expendables 3
Not yet rated
Poor Wesley Snipes. After being nailed for income tax evasion he was forced to serve two sentences: one in prison, the other on set with the Italian Stallion, The Governator and Mel Gibson. It’s old school vs. new school, young vs. old, tired storylines vs. tired storylines in this popular franchise starring all  the aforementioned plus Harrison Ford and other washed-up old men on testosterone replacement therapy.

The Giver
Not yet rated
Would a world where everything is free of all suffering and general unpleasantries be considered utopian or dystopian? This and other burning socio-philosophical questions are explored in this screen adaptation of the sci-fi children’s book adaptation. Probably one of the more thought-provoking films of the season could make for excellent family dinner-table discussion. Alexander Skarsgard (Trueblood) provides the eye candy. Also starring Taylor Swift, Meryl Streep and Katie Holmes (who’s probably not unfamiliar with the premise).

Aug. 22
Sin City: A Dame to Kill For
Not yet rated
Nearly a decade later, the sequel to Frank Miller’s graphic novel adaptation isn’t generating the kind of frothy anticipation you’d expect from something this sexy. It could be the lag, it could be Miller’s controversial politics or maybe it’s that notorious buzz-kill Lady Gaga. Don’t let the underwhelm discourage you; besides the fact that Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Jessica Alba star, the “visuals” will be worth the price of admission.

Geek Notes
 “The first film did well and was heralded for being so faithful to the source material. Having a sequel to that film nine years later is a bit odd, but is interesting nonetheless and could be good.”
Tom Franck, Comics and Comics

Sin City seems like too little too late. While there is material for a saga, it seems that the delays and death of Brittany Murphy should have put this franchise to rest. I honestly feel this is a revival of an older film rather than a continuation. We’ll either like what we see, or try and act like it never happened.”
Nick Gonzalez, Main Street Comics

Sin City: A Dame to Kill For might have more good fan buzz about it had it come out a little more closely to the generally highly regarded first film, but at this point it feels like it’s too little, too late. At the very least, I hope it reminds people that there are some great graphic novels that inspired the film.”
Mike Sterling, Seth’s Games and Anime/Ralph’s Comic Corner


Visit Tom Franck and Comics and Comics at Seth's Games and Anime/Ralph's Comic Corner is located at 2379 E. Main St., Ventura, 653-2732 or Main Street Comics is located at The Armory gaming center is located at 1496 Tower Square, Ventura, 650-1213 or


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