Free Will Astrology

Free Will Astrology

ARIES
(March 21-April 19):
”They are trying to make me into a fixed star,” complained religious leader Martin Luther a few centuries ago. “I am an irregular planet.” I invite you to use that declaration as your own in the coming weeks. You have every right to avoid being pinned down, pigeonholed and forced to be consistent. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you need abundant freedom to mutate your identity. You deserve a poetic license that allows you to play a variety of different roles and explore the pleasures of unpredictable self-expression.

TAURUS
(April 20-May 20):
”The Star-Spangled Banner” is America’s national anthem. It features the lyrics of a patriotic poem written by Francis Scott Key. But the melody itself is entirely lifted from a bawdy old song that celebrates Bacchus, the ancient god of wine and ecstatic dancing. I love it when things are repurposed as dramatically as that. Do you? The coming weeks will be prime time to repurpose stuff with creative abandon. Make the past useful for the future, Taurus. Turn good old ideas into fantastic new ones. Don’t just recycle; transform.


GEMINI

(May 21-June 20):
I’m guessing that in the coming weeks you will be receiving a multitude of inquiries, invitations and temptations — probably more than you feel capable of responding to, and certainly more than you should respond to. A few of these opportunities might be appealing and lead to interesting adventures. But some will be useless, diversionary or trivial. Will you be able to tell the difference? That’s your big challenge. If you’d like help dodging unwanted solicitations, give out this phone number as your own: (212) 479-7990. It’s a free service provide by “The Rejection Line” at Rejectionline.com. People calling that number will be politely told you aren’t available.

CANCER
(June 21-July 22):
For millennia, the plant known as the yellow avalanche lily has thrived on mountain slopes and meadows throughout western North America. It blooms early in the spring, just in time for broad-tailed hummingbirds that migrate from Central America to sip the flower’s nectar. But now there’s a problem with that ancient arrangement. Due to global warming, the lily now blossoms 17 days earlier than it used to. But the hummingbirds haven’t made an adjustment in their schedule, so they’re barely showing up in time to get their full allotment of nectar. I suspect this is a metaphor for a shift you may be facing in your own life rhythm. Fortunately, you’ve been forewarned, and you can adjust better than the hummingbirds.

LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22):
In our calendar, there is no special holiday devoted to honoring the joy and power of rebellion. This oversight confounds me. All my experience tells me that the urge to revolt is a fundamental human need. Every one of us has a sacred duty to regularly rise up and overthrow a stale status quo that is oppressing us — whether that’s an organized group effort we’re part of or our own deadening routine. I’m telling you this, Leo, because it’s an excellent time to celebrate your own Rebellion Jubilee. Your vitality will soar as you shed numbing habits and decaying traditions.

VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
Recently you’ve had resemblances to an 8-year-old kid wearing the pajamas you loved when you were 5. Your bare arms are jutting out beyond where the sleeves end, and there’s a similar thing going on with your legs. The fabric is ripped here and there because it can’t accommodate how much you’ve grown. You’re feeling discomfort in places where the overly tight fit is squeezing your flesh. All of this is somewhat cute but mostly alarming. I wish you would wean yourself off the past and update your approach.

LIBRA
(Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
A lot of leopard frogs live on Staten Island, one of New York City’s five boroughs. Most of them make a sound that resembles a long snore or a rapid chuckle. But over the years, biologists have also detected a third type of frogly expression: a clipped, repetitive croak. Just this year, they finally figured out that this belonged to an entirely distinct species of leopard frog that they had never before identified. It’s still so new it doesn’t have a name yet. I expect a metaphorically similar development in your life, Libra. You will become aware of a secret that has been hiding in plain sight. You will “find” something that actually revealed itself to you some time ago.

SCORPIO
(Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
Tom Tolbert is a sports talk show host on San Francisco radio station KNBR. I am amazingly neutral about him. Nothing he says fascinates me or mirrors my own thoughts. On the other hand, he never makes me mad and he’s not boring. I neither like him nor dislike him. I simply see him for who he is, without any regard for what he can do for me. He has become a symbol of the possibility that I’m able to look at a human being with complete impartiality, having no wish for him to be different from what he is. In the coming week, I suggest you try to achieve this enlightened state of mind on a regular basis. It’s prime time, astrologically speaking, to ripen your mastery of the art of objectivity.

 
SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
If you say “rabbit rabbit rabbit” as soon as you wake up on the first day of the month, you will have good luck for the next 30 to 31 days. At least that’s how reality works according to a British superstition. But judging from your astrological omens, I don’t think you will have to resort to magic tricks like that to stimulate your good fortune. In the next four weeks, I suspect you will be the beneficiary of a flood of cosmic mojo, as well as a surge of divine woowoo, a shower of astral juju, and an upwelling of universal googoo gaga. If it would give you even more confidence to invoke your favorite superstitions, though, go right ahead. Even scientists say that kind of thing works: tinyurl.com/SuperstitiousBoost.

CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
According to Greek myth, Perseus cut off the head of Medusa. She was the creature whose hair was composed of snakes and whose gaze could turn a person into stone.  The immortal winged horse Pegasus was instantaneously born from Medusa’s blood. He ultimately became an ally to the nine Muses, and Zeus relied on him to carry thunder and lightning. I predict that while you’re sleeping, Capricorn, you will have a dream that contains elements of this myth. Here’s a preliminary interpretation of that dream: You are undergoing a transition that could in a sense give you the power of flight and a more abundant access to a muse.

AQUARIUS
(Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
It’s time for you to be leader of the pack, Aquarius, to take your gang to the next level, to make sure the group mind isn’t suppressing innovation and enforcing peer pressure but is rather inspiring all members of the tribe to be as creative as they dare to be. And if it’s not realistic for you to wield that much power, then do whatever you can to synergize the alliances that hold your posse together. Build team morale. Gossip constructively. Conspire to animate an influx of fresh magic.


PISCES

(Feb. 19-March 20):
If you’re a food company that wants to sell chicken in the shape of a chicken wing, it must have actual chicken wing meat in it. Otherwise, the law says you’ve got to call your product “wyngz.” I’ve always thought that there’s a lot of information the media presents as “news” that is really as fake as wyngz. That’s why I advocate calling the bogus stuff “newzak” (rhymes with “muzak”). Your assignment in the coming weeks, Pisces, is to make sure you’re not putting out any wyngz- or newzak-like stuff in your own chosen field. The fates will help you rather dramatically if you put a high premium on authenticity.

Homework:
What’s the title of the book you’d like to write? What’s the name of the rock band you’d be in? Testify at Freewillastrology.com.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES and DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HORSCOPES.

The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at  1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

Free Will Astrology

Free Will Astrology

 

ARIES
(March 21-April 19):
”Don’t think about making art, just get it done,” said Andy Warhol. “Let everyone else decide if it’s good or bad, whether they love it or hate it. While they are deciding, make even more art.” I encourage you to adopt that mini-manifesto for your own purposes in the coming weeks, Aries. If you’re not an artist, simply substitute the appropriate phrase for “making art.” It could be “creating interesting relationships,” “exploring exotic lands,” “changing corrupt political institutions,” “fixing environmental problems” or even “making money.” The main point is: Focus on doing what drives your quest for meaning, and forget about what people think of it.

TAURUS
(April 20-May 20):
A Jungian writer whose name I have unfortunately misplaced made the following observations: “In a man’s psyche, the unconscious is experienced as chaotic, filled with violent and irrational processes of generation and destruction. But to a woman’s psyche the unconscious is a fascinating matrix of sacred images and rituals which in their wildly contradictory meanings express the secret unity of all life.” After analyzing the astrological omens, I suspect that you Taurus men now have an unprecedented opportunity to experience your unconscious as women do. As for you Taurus women: You have the chance to get a vivid, visceral understanding of how true this description of the female unconscious is.

GEMINI
(May 21-June 20):
Let’s talk about the Decision. I’m referring to the Choice you have been dancing around and fretting about and analyzing to death. By my estimate, there are at least 15 different solutions you could pursue. But just seven of those solutions would meet the requirements of being intelligent, responsible and fun. Of those seven, only four would be intelligent, responsible, fun and enduring. Of those four, only two would be intelligent, responsible, fun, enduring and the best for all concerned. I suggest you opt for one of those two.

CANCER
(June 21-July 22):
I’m not necessarily asserting that you need to edit yourself, Cancerian. Only you can decide that. But I will state unequivocally that if there is in fact any editing needed, now would be a good time to do it. You will have extra insight about what aspects of your life might benefit from being condensed, corrected and fine-tuned. It’s also true that the rectifications you do in the coming weeks will be relatively smooth and painless. So look into the possibilities, please. Should you calm your blame reflex? Downsize a huffy attitude? Shed some emotional baggage?

LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22):
How many times have you been in love, Leo? Just once or twice? Or have you dived into the depths of amorous togetherness again and again over the years? Whatever the case may be, I bet you have strong ideas about the nature of passionate romance and profound intimacy. That’s natural and normal. But I’m going to ask you to temporarily forget everything you think you know about all that stuff. I invite you to become innocent again, cleansed of all your mature, jaded, hopeful and resentful thoughts about the game of love. In my astrological opinion, there’s no better way for you to prepare for what will come next.

VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
A medical research journal reported on a British woman who accidentally swallowed a felt-tip pen. It lay there in her stomach for 25 years. When surgeons finally removed it, they were surprised to find it still worked. I am not suggesting that anything remotely as exotic or bizarre will be happening to you, Virgo. I do suspect, though, that you will soon have an experience with certain metaphorical resemblances to that event. For example, you may retrieve and find use for an element of your past that has been gone or missing for a long time.

LIBRA
(Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
”Sapiosexual” is a relatively new word that refers to a person who is erotically attracted to intelligence. Urbandictionary.com gives an example of how it might be used: “I want an incisive, inquisitive, insightful, irreverent mind. I want someone for whom philosophical discussion is foreplay. I want a sapiosexual.” In the coming weeks, Libra, I suspect you will be closer to fitting this definition than you’ve ever been before. The yearning that’s rising up in you is filled with the need to be stimulated by brilliance, to be influenced by wisdom, to be catalyzed by curiosity.

SCORPIO
(Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
In 2007 the band White Stripes did a tour of Canada. One of their final gigs was outdoors in St. John’s, Newfoundland. They came on stage, played one note — a C-sharp — and declared the performance over. It was the briefest rock show in history. Judging from the current astrological omens, Scorpio, I’m thinking it would be a good time for you to do some almost equally pithy things. You have the potential to be extremely concise and intense and focused in all you do. I urge you to fulfill that potential. Pack every speech, gesture and action with a concentrated wealth of meaning.

 
SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
Your redesigned thrust vectoring matrix is finally operational. Love those new nozzles! Moreover, you’ve managed to purge all the bugs from your cellular tracking pulse, and your high-resolution flux capacitor is retooled and as sexy as a digitally remastered simulation of your first kiss. You’re almost ready for takeoff, Sagittarius! The most important task left to do is to realign your future shock absorbers. No more than a week from now, I expect you to be flying high and looking very, very good.

CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
The plot twists will be intriguing. The actors may be unpredictable, even erratic. Blossoming and decay will be happening simultaneously, and the line between wisdom and craziness could get blurry. There’s not nearly enough room in this little horoscope to describe the epic sweep of the forces working behind the scenes. Are you willing to confront uncanny truths that other people might regard as too unruly? Are you brave enough to penetrate to the depths that others are too timid to look at, let alone deal with? I hope you are, Capricorn, because that will give you the power to ultimately emerge from the drama with your integrity shining and your intelligence boosted.


AQUARIUS

(Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
Psychologists have done studies that suggest we subconsciously adopt the qualities of fictional characters we read about or see in movies. That’s not a problem if those characters are smart, ethical, highly motivated people whose ideals are similar to ours. But if the heroes of the stories we absorb are jerks who treat others badly and make messes wherever they go, our imitative urges may lead us astray. Right now is a crucial time for you to be extra-careful about the role models you allow to seep into your imagination. You’re especially susceptible to taking on their attributes. I say, be proactive: Expose yourself intensely to only the very best fictional characters who embody the heights you aspire to reach.

PISCES
(Feb. 19-March 20):
”The fates guide him who will; him who won’t, they drag.” So said the ancient Greek philosopher Seneca, and now I’m passing it on to you. It’s an excellent time for you to think about the issue. Ask yourself: Have you been cooperating with fate so that it has maximum power to shepherd you? Have you been working closely with fate, giving it good reasons to consistently provide you with useful hints and timely nudges? Or have you been avoiding fate, even resisting it out of laziness or ignorance, compelling it to yank you along? Spend the next few weeks making sure your relationship with fate is strong and righteous.

Homework: What good old thing could you give up in order to attract a great new thing into your life? Testify at Freewillastrology.com.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES and DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HORSCOPES.

The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at  1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

Free Will Astrology

Free Will Astrology

 

ARIES
(March 21-April 19):
In old Christian and Islamic lore, the dove was a symbol of the holy spirit. The bird was considered so pure and sacred that the devil, who was an expert shapeshifter, could not take on its form. The dove had a different meaning in other traditions, however. Among the ancient Greeks, it had a special relationship with Aphrodite, the goddess of love. In Rome, its eggs were regarded as aphrodisiacs. Drawing on all these meanings, I’m nominating the dove to be your power animal in the coming week. You will have an excellent chance to intensify your connection with divine truths through the power of love and eros — and vice versa.

TAURUS
(April 20-May 20):
Your next assignment is to deepen and refine your relationship with your temptations. That doesn’t mean you should shed all caution and simply give in to them. Rather, I’m suggesting you escape the bind that makes you feel like you have to either ruthlessly repress your complicated longings or else thoroughly express them. Is there an in-between position you can find? A way you can appreciate the mysterious gift that the temptations confer and not be miserably obsessed by them? A perspective in which you’re neither tormented by guilt nor driven to compromise your integrity?

GEMINI
(May 21-June 20):
You’re a bit like a professional jet pilot who is operating the pirate ship ride at an amusement park. You have resemblances to a top chef who’s shopping for gourmet ingredients in a seedy convenience store. In other words, Gemini, you may feel slightly off-kilter or dispossessed, even though you have a lot going for you. Here’s the best possible thing you could do while you wait for the fates to show you how to make a correction: Make it your intention to feel centered, poised and at peace exactly as you are right now.

CANCER
(June 21-July 22):
Contrary to conventional wisdom, there is currently enough food available to feed everyone on the planet. The problem is, it’s not distributed efficiently. Some people get far more food than they need, and even waste a lot of it, while less fortunate folks go hungry. I invite you to think about whether you might have a metaphorically comparable situation in your own life, Cancerian. Is there a part of your psyche that’s well-nurtured but a different part that receives meager shares of love and support? Are you overstuffed in one way but starved in another? The coming weeks would be an excellent time to correct such an imbalance. (More on food: tinyurl.com/HungryWorld.)

LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22):
This horoscope is not an advertisement for ceremonial shovels. I am receiving no payment from a ceremonial shovel company for suggesting that you procure a customized engraved gold digging tool for your own personal use. And I will feel fine if you don’t actually get a real one, but instead merely imagine yourself wielding a pretend version. The fact is, Leo, the coming weeks will be an excellent time to do a groundbreaking ritual: to dig up the first scoop of metaphorical dirt in the place where you will build your future dream house, masterpiece or labor of love.

VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
I don’t think you’re fully aware of the game you’ve been immersed in. You may even be in denial that you’re playing it. If I’m right about this, please make it a priority to acknowledge what’s going on and identify the exact nature of the game. You can’t afford to be innocent about the subterranean forces that are in motion. It’s especially important not to be too nice and polite to see the complicated truth. Please note: There’s no need to be a cynical shark — that would be as inappropriate a response as being a sweet little lamb. But you should definitely activate your jungle senses.

LIBRA
(Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
On Reddit.com, someone asked members of the community the following: What is your best unanswerable question? Among the more serious offerings were “What is love?”, “What is magic?”, “Why is there something as opposed to nothing?”, and “What is the meaning of life?” Then there were more avant-garde possibilities: “Where do squirrels go during hurricanes?”, “Could Jesus microwave a burrito so hot that he himself could not eat it?”, and “If I asked you to sleep with me, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?” After evaluating the current astrological omens, Libra, I urge you to pose your own best riddle — a query that will provide maximum stimulation as you meditate on it during the next four months.


SCORPIO

(Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
An environmental organization in New Zealand found that the local fishing industry wastes about 70 percent of its haul. In contrast, Iceland manages to use 96 percent of every fish caught. For example, New Zealand companies throw away most of the liver, roe and heads of the fish, while Iceland has come up with ways to take advantage of all that stuff. Judging from your current astrological omens, Scorpio, I conclude that it’s crucial for you to take your cue from Iceland rather than New Zealand in the coming weeks. Be inventive, efficient and thorough in harnessing the power of all your raw materials.

 
SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
”They will say you are on the wrong road,” said poet Antonio Porchia, “if it is your own.” I suspect you may have to deal with wrong-headed badgering like that in the coming weeks, Sagittarius. In fact, you could experience a surge of discouraging words and bad advice that tries to shoo you away from the path with heart. Some of the push may come from enemies, some from friends or loved ones, and some from deluded little voices in your own head. I hope you won’t be demoralized by the onslaught, but will instead respond like a brave hero who uses adversity as a motivating force.

CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
I’m sure you’ve got thousands of practical details to attend to. Your schedule may be as busy as it has been in months. But I hope you will find time to do what I consider essential to your well-being, and that is to wander and wonder. In fact, let’s make that your motto: to wander and wonder. Even if it’s just for a few stolen moments between your serious appointments, allow yourself to meander off into the unknown and marvel at all the curious things you find. Be on the lookout for high strangeness that thrills your imagination, for exotic pleasures that titillate your lust for novelty, and for fertile chaos that blows your mind in all the right ways.

AQUARIUS
(Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
James Joyce was a great novelist but not much of a fighter. He picked a more imposing and athletic buddy to go drinking with, though: Ernest Hemingway. If the two men encountered any alcohol-induced trouble, Joyce would slink behind his friend and yell, “Deal with him, Hemingway, deal with him!” I don’t anticipate that you’ll be in the vicinity of any bar scuffles in the coming week, Aquarius. But I do think you would benefit from having a potent and persuasive ally on your side. It’s time to add some heft and clout to your arsenal of resources.


PISCES

(Feb. 19-March 20):
Is it possible that you have been too receptive and empathetic for your own good lately? I mean, I love how attuned you are to the ebb and flow of subtle energies — it’s one of your most winsome and powerful qualities — but I fear you may be going too far. As heroic as it might seem to be the most sensitive and responsive person in a 10-mile radius, I’d rather see you work on being more self-contained right now. That’s why, for a limited time only, I’m recommending that you turn the full force of your touchy-feely solicitude on yourself.

Homework: You can read free excerpts of my most recent book at http://bit.ly/GoodHappy. Tell me what you think at Truthrooster@gmail.com.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES and DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HORSCOPES. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at  1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

Free Will Astrology

Free Will Astrology

ARIES
(March 21-April 19):
The data that’s stored and disseminated on the Internet is unimaginably voluminous. And yet the 540 billion trillion electrons that carry all this information weigh about the same as a strawberry. I’d like to use this fun fact as a metaphor for the work you’re doing these days — and the play, too. Your output is prodigious. Your intensity is on the verge of becoming legendary. The potency of your efforts is likely to set in motion effects that will last for a long time. And yet, to the naked eye or casual observer, it all might look as simple and light as a strawberry.

TAURUS
(April 20-May 20):
What if you have a twin sister or brother that your mother gave up for adoption right after you were born and never told you about? Or what if you have a soul twin you’ve never met — a potential ally who understands life in much the same ways that you do? In either case, now is a time when the two of you might finally discover each other. At the very least, Taurus, I suspect you’ll be going deeper and deeper with a kindred spirit who will help you transform your stories about your origins and make you feel more at home on the planet.

GEMINI
(May 21-June 20):
I urged my readers to meditate on death, not as the end of physical life but as a metaphor for shedding what’s outworn. I then asked them to describe the best death they had ever experienced. I got a response that’s applicable to you right now. It’s from a reader named Judd: “My best death was getting chicken pox at age 13 while living in the Philippines. My mother banished me to the TV room. I was uncomfortable but hyperactive, lonely and driven to agony by the awful shows. But after six hours, something popped. My suffering turned inside out, and a miracle bloomed. I closed my eyes and my imagination opened up like a vortex. Images, ideas, places, dreams, people familiar and strange — all amazing, colorful, and vibrant — flowed through my head. I knew then and there that no material thing on this Earth could hook me up to the source of life like my own thoughts. I was free!”

CANCER
(June 21-July 22):
Conservationists are surprised by what has been transpiring in and around Nepal’s Chitwan National Park. The tigers that live there have changed their schedule. Previously, they prowled around at all hours, day and night. But as more people have moved into the area, the creatures have increasingly become nocturnal. Researchers who have studied the situation believe the tigers are doing so in order to better coexist with humans. I suspect that a metaphorically similar development is possible for you, Cancerian. Meditate on how the wildest part of your life could adapt better to the most civilized part — and vice versa. (Read more: tinyurl.com/HumanTiger.)

LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22):
What is a dry waterfall? The term may refer to the location of an extinct waterfall where a river once fell over a cliff but has since stopped flowing. Döda Fallet in Sweden is such a place. “Dry waterfall” may also signify a waterfall that only exists for a while after a heavy rain and then disappears again. One example is on Brukkaros Mountain in Namibia. A third variant shows up in Cliffs Beyond Abiquiu, Dry Waterfall, a landscape painting by Georgia O’Keeffe. It’s a lush rendering of a stark landscape near the New Mexico town where O’Keeffe lived. Soon you will have your own metaphorical version of a dry waterfall, Leo. It’s ready for you if you’re ready for it.

VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
You are getting to where you need to be, but you’re still not there. You have a good share of the raw materials you will require to accomplish your goal, but as of yet you don’t have enough of the structure that will make everything work. The in-between state you’re inhabiting reminds me of a passage from the author Elias Canetti: “His head is made of stars, but not yet arranged into constellations.” Your next assignment, Virgo, is to see what you can do about coalescing a few constellations.


LIBRA

(Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
Doctors used to believe that ulcers were caused by stress and spicy foods. But in the 1980s, two researchers named Barry Marshall and Robin Warren began to promote an alternative theory. They believed the culprit was H. pylori, a type of bacteria. To test their hypothesis, Marshall drank a Petri dish full of H. pylori. Within days he got gastric symptoms and underwent an endoscopy. The evidence proved that he and his partner were correct. They won a Nobel Prize for their work. (And Marshall recovered just fine.) I urge you to be inspired by their approach, Libra. Formulate experiments that allow you to make practical tests of your ideas, and consider using yourself as a guinea pig.

SCORPIO
(Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
This is not prime time for you to rake in rewards, collect hard-earned goodies, and celebrate successes you’ve been building toward for a long time. It’s fine if you end up doing those things, but I suspect that what you’re best suited for right now is getting things started. You’ll attract help from unexpected sources if you lay the groundwork for projects you want to work on throughout 2013. You’ll be in alignment with cosmic rhythms, too. Your motto comes from your fellow Scorpio, writer Robert Louis Stevenson: “Judge each day not by the harvest you reap but by the seeds you plant.”

 
SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
On a beach, a man spied a pelican that was barely moving. Was it sick? He wanted to help. Drawing close, he discovered that ants were crawling all over it. He brushed them off, then carried the bird to his car and drove it to a veterinarian. After a thorough examination, the doctor realized the pelican was suffering from a fungus that the ants had been eating away — and probably would have removed completely if the man hadn’t interfered. Moral of the story: Sometimes healing takes place in unexpected ways, and nature knows better than we do about how to make it happen. Keep that in mind during the coming weeks, Sagittarius.

CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
A farmer in Japan found a 56-leaf clover. Well, actually, he bred it in his garden at home. It took effort on his part. Presumably, it provided him with 14 times the luck of a mere four-leaf clover. I don’t think your good karma will be quite that extravagant in the coming week, Capricorn, but there’s a decent chance you’ll get into at least the 16-leaf realm. To raise your odds of approaching the 56-leaf level of favorable fortune, remember this: Luck tends to flow in the direction of those who work hard to prepare for it and earn it.

AQUARIUS
(Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
The largest bell in the world is located in Moscow, Russia. Called the Tsar Bell, it’s made of bronze, weighs 445,170 pounds, and is elaborately decorated with images of people, angels, and plants. It has never once been rung in its 275 years of existence. Is there anything comparable in your own life, Aquarius? Some huge presence that has never actually been used? The time is near when that stillness may finally come to an end. I suggest you decide how this will occur rather than allowing fate to choose for you.

PISCES
(Feb. 19-March 20):
Are you interested in experiencing a close brush with a holy anomaly or a rowdy blessing or a divine wild card? If not, that’s perfectly OK. Just say, “No, I’m not ready for a lyrical flurry of uncanny grace.” And the freaky splendor or convulsive beauty or mystical mutation will avoid making contact with you, no questions asked. But if you suspect you might enjoy communing with a subversive blast of illumination — if you think you could have fun coming to terms with a tricky epiphany that blows your mind — then go out under the night sky and whisper a message like this: “I’m ready for you, sweetness. Find me.”

Homework: Name 10 items you would put in a time capsule to be dug up by your descendants in 500 years. Testify at Freewillastrology.com.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES and DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HORSCOPES.

The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at  1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

Free Will Astrology

Free Will Astrology

ARIES
(March 21-April 19):
Big opportunities are coming up for you. Even if you cash in on them, though, they aren’t likely to make an immediate practical impact. They are subtle and deep, these prospects. They have the potential of catalyzing monumental shifts in your long-term unfolding, but will take a while to transform your day-to-day rhythm. So what are these openings? Here are my guesses: 1. You could root out a bad seed that got embedded in your subconscious mind before you knew any better. 2. You could reinterpret the meaning of certain turning points in your past, thereby revising the flow of your life story. 3. You could forgive yourself for an old sin you thought you’d never let go of. 4. You could receive a friendly shock that will diminish some sadness you’ve carried for a long time.

TAURUS
(April 20-May 20):
This would be a good time to get introspective and meditative about your urge to merge . . . to think objectively about the way you approach togetherness . . . to be honest with yourself about what strengths and weaknesses you bring to the art of collaboration. The most important question you can ask yourself during this inventory is this: “How do I personally contribute, either knowingly or unconsciously, to the problems I experience in relationships?” Here’s another query you might consider: “How hard am I willing to work to create the kinds of intimacy and alliances I say I want?”

GEMINI
(May 21-June 20):
“Dear Rob: I seem to be marooned in an interesting limbo. The sights and sounds are not exactly pretty, but they keep me perversely entertained. I’m sampling tastes that are more sour than sweet, thinking that sooner or later the sweetness will start to prevail — but it never does. Sometimes I feel like I’m in a trance, unable to do what’s best for me. Can you offer any help? Like maybe give me a password that would break me out of the trance? —Meandering Gemini.” Dear Meandering: This is one of those rare times when you have cosmic permission to favor what’s calming and reassuring rather than what’s amusing and stimulating. Your password is sanctuary.

CANCER
(June 21-July 22):
On Sept. 22, the San Francisco Giants played a baseball game against the San Diego Padres. In the fourth inning, Giants third baseman Pablo Sandoval sprinted to the edge of the field, then hurled himself over a railing and into the crowd in order to snag a foul pop-up. The fact that he landed upside down but perfectly unhurt wasn’t the most impressive aspect of his feat. Nor was his improbable ability to wield such precise concentration while invoking so much raw force. Even more amazing was the pink bubble that Sandoval blew with his chewing gum nanoseconds before he dived. It was a supremely playful and successful Zen moment. That’s the spirit I hope you will bring to your efforts in the coming days.

LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22):
Your unconscious mind will be more accessible than usual in the coming weeks. It will reveal its agendas more clearly and play more of an active role in your life. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? It will depend on how open-minded you are toward the surprises your secret self will reveal. If you try to ignore or repress its eruptions, they’ll probably wreak chaos. If, on the other hand, you treat this other part of you as an unpredictable but generous ally, you may be able to work out a collaboration that serves you both.

VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
Urbandictionary.com defines “Skymall solution” as “an absurdly single-purposed tool or solution that solves a problem you don’t actually have.” The term is derived from the famous Skymall catalog, which sells unusual specialty products. According to my analysis of the current astrological omens, you should be wary of any attraction you might have to Skymall solutions. Do you really need a King Tut tissue box cover or an ice cube tray that makes ice in the shape of dachshunds or a stencil set for putting messages on your bundt cake? I doubt it. Nor do you need their metaphorical equivalents.

LIBRA
(Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
Right before I woke up this morning, I had a dream that one of my teeth fell out. As I lay there groggily in bed, my mind searched for its meaning. “What does losing a tooth symbolize?” I asked myself. “What is its psychological meaning?” I promised myself that when I got up, I would Google that question. But my rumination was interrupted by a dull ache in the back of my mouth, and it was only then that I remembered: Yesterday, in actual waking life, I had a real tooth yanked out by a real dentist. The moral of the story, Libra: Be wary of making up elaborate stories and mythic assumptions about events that have simple, mundane explanations.

SCORPIO
(Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
This is an excellent time to explore the frontiers of wise foolishness. I’m hoping you will take full advantage of learning opportunities that might require you to shed your excess dignity and acknowledge how much you don’t know. Are you brave enough to disavow cynical thoughts and jaded attitudes that muffle your lust for life? Are you smart enough to understand how healthy it would be to go out and play like an innocent wild child? Make yourself available for delightful surprises. 

SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
Zombies used to be terrifying. But then they became a featured motif in pop culture, often in humorous contexts, and now there’s a growing acceptance and even affection for them. Here’s the view of Max Brooks, author of The Zombie Survival Guide: “Eventually rock and roll morphs from Sid Vicious to the Jonas Brothers. Same thing with vampires: We went from Dracula to Twilight to make them peachy and G-rated. I guarantee you someone is working on a way to take the fear out of zombies and market them to children.” Your assignment, Scorpio, is to do to your personal fears what the entertainment industry has done to zombies: Turn them into amusing caricatures that don’t trouble you so much. For example, visualize an adversary singing a duet with Justin Bieber.

CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
“You must learn from the mistakes of others,” said humorist Sam Levenson. “You can’t possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.” That’s excellent advice for you right now, Capricorn. In order to glean the teachings you need most, you won’t have to bumble through a single wrong turn or bad decision yourself. There will be plenty of blundering role models who will be providing you with the precise inspiration you need. Study them carefully.

AQUARIUS
(Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
Every November, thousands of writers participate in National Novel Writing Month. They pledge to compose at least 50,000 words of a new novel in that 30-day period. In accordance with the astrological omens, Aquarius, I propose that you commit yourself to a comparable project in your own field. Is there a potential masterpiece on which you could get a substantial amount of work done? Is there a major transformation you’ve long wanted to undertake but have always had some excuse to avoid? I predict that you will attract unexpected help and luck if you summon the willpower to focus on that task.

PISCES
(Feb. 19-March 20):
Don’t believe the climate is changing? Go ask the birds what they think. Sixty percent of all the feathered species in North America have moved north in the past 46 years. Scientists are pretty sure their migration is a response to the warming trend that’s afoot. I like the idea of tuning in to how animals behave in order to get accurate information about the state of the world. Would you consider doing more of that, Pisces? According to my astrological analysis, the coming months will be a time when you can learn a lot from nonhuman intelligences.

Homework: It’s easy to see fanaticism, rigidity and intolerance in other people, but harder to acknowledge them in yourself. Do you dare? Tell all at Freewillastrology.com.

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UPCOMING COMMUNITY EVENTS

  1. WEEKLY SOUND BATH – THOUSAND OAKS

    April 24 @ 12:00 pm - 1:00 pm
  2. Margarita Mixoff & More!

    April 25 @ 5:30 pm - 8:00 pm
  3. Margarita Mixoff & More!

    April 25 @ 5:30 pm - 8:00 pm
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    April 25 @ 6:30 pm - 9:00 pm
  5. CLUFest 2019: Colors

    April 26 @ 8:00 am - May 18 @ 7:00 pm
  6. Thingamajig V: A Printmaking and Ceramics Exploration

    April 26 @ 8:00 am - May 11 @ 8:00 pm
  7. 11th Annual Mother’s Day Luncheon

    April 26 @ 11:30 am - 2:00 pm
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    April 26 @ 5:00 pm - 10:00 pm
  9. WEEKLY SOUND BATH – THOUSAND OAKS

    April 26 @ 7:00 pm - 8:00 pm
  10. Sydney’s 5K Run/Walk

    April 27 @ 9:00 am - 12:00 pm

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