Free Will Astrology

Free Will Astrology

 

ARIES
(March 21-April 19):
On a January morning in 1943, the town of Spearfish, South Dakota, experienced very weird weather. At 7:30 a.m. the temperature was minus 4 degrees Fahrenheit. In the next two minutes, due to an unusual type of wind sweeping down over nearby Lookout Mountain, thermometers shot up 49 degrees. Over the next hour and a half, the air grew even warmer. But by 9:30, the temperature had plummeted back to minus 4 degrees. I’m wondering if your moods might swing with this much bounce in the coming weeks. As long as you keep in mind that no single feeling is likely to last very long, it doesn’t have to be a problem. You may even find a way to enjoy the breathtaking ebbs and flows. Halloween costume suggestion: roller coaster rider, Jekyll and Hyde, warm clothes on one side of your body and shorts or bathing suit on the other.  

TAURUS
(April 20-May 20):
How dare you be so magnetic and tempting? What were you thinking when you turned up the intensity of your charm to such a high level? I suggest you consider exercising more caution about expressing your radiance. People may have other things to do besides daydreaming about you. But if you really can’t bring yourself to be a little less attractive — if you absolutely refuse to tone yourself down — please at least try to be extra kind and generous. Share your emotional wealth. Overflow with more than your usual allotments of blessings. Halloween costume suggestion: a shamanic Santa Claus; a witchy Easter Bunny.

GEMINI
(May 21-June 20):
In the last 10 days of November and the month of December, I suspect there will be wild-card interludes when you can enjoy smart gambles, daring stunts, cute tricks and mythic escapades. But the next three weeks will not be like that. On the contrary. For the immediate future, I think you should be an upstanding citizen, a well-behaved helper and a dutiful truth-teller. Can you handle that? If so, I bet you will get sneak peaks of the fun and productive mischief that could be yours in the last six weeks of 2015. Halloween costume suggestion: the most normal person in the world.

 
CANCER

(June 21-July 22):
Members of the gazelle species known as the springbok periodically engage in a behavior known as pronking. They leap into the air and propel themselves a great distance with all four feet off the ground, bounding around with abandon. What evolutionary purpose does this serve? Some scientists are puzzled, but not naturalist David Attenborough. In the documentary film Africa, he follows a springbok herd as it wanders through the desert for months, hoping to find a rare rainstorm. Finally it happens. As if in celebration, the springboks erupt with an outbreak of pronking. “They are dancing for joy,” Attenborough declares. Given the lucky breaks and creative breakthroughs coming your way, Cancerian, I foresee you doing something similar. Halloween costume suggestion: a pronking gazelle, a hippety-hopping bunny, a boisterous baby goat.

LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22):
“A very little key will open a very heavy door,” wrote Charles Dickens in his short story Hunted Down. Make that one of your guiding meditations in the coming days, Leo. In the back of your mind, keep visualizing the image of a little key opening a heavy door. Doing so will help ensure that you’ll be alert when clues about the real key’s location become available. You will have a keen intuitive sense of how you’ll need to respond if you want to procure it. Halloween costume suggestion: proud and protective possessor of a magic key.  

VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
The ancient Hindu text known as the Kama Sutra gives extensive advice about many subjects, including love and sex. “Though a man loves a woman ever so much,” reads a passage in chapter four, “he never succeeds in winning her without a great deal of talking.” Take that as your cue, Virgo. In the coming weeks, stir up the intimacy you want with a great deal of incisive talking that beguiles and entertains. Furthermore, use the same approach to round up any other experience you yearn for. The way you play with language will be crucial in your efforts to fulfill your wishes. Luckily, I expect your persuasive powers to be even greater than they usually are. Halloween costume suggestion: the ultimate salesperson.


LIBRA

(Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
I encourage you to be super rhythmical and melodious in the coming days. Don’t just sing in the shower and in the car. Hum and warble and whistle while shopping for vegetables and washing the dishes and walking the dog. Allot yourself more than enough time to shimmy and cavort, not just on the dance floor but anywhere else you can get away with it. For extra credit, experiment with lyrical flourishes whenever you’re in bed doing the jizzle-skazzle. Halloween costume suggestion: wandering troubadour, street musician, free-styling rapper, operatic diva, medicine woman who heals with sound.

SCORPIO
(Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
I expect you to be in a state of continual birth for the next four weeks. Awakening and activation will come naturally. Your drive to blossom and create may be irresistible, bordering on unruly. Does that sound overwhelming? I don’t think it will be a problem as long as you cultivate a mood of amazed amusement about how strong it feels. To help maintain your poise, keep in mind that your growth spurt is a natural response to the dissolution that preceded it. Halloween costume suggestion: a fountain, an erupting volcano, the growing beanstalk from the Jack and the Beanstalk fairy tale.

SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
“Just as a snake sheds its skin, we must shed our past over and over again.” So says Buddhist teacher Jack Kornfield. Can you guess why I’m bringing it to your attention, Sagittarius? It’s one of those times when you can do yourself a big favor by sloughing off the stale, worn-out, decaying parts of your past. Luckily for you, you now have an extraordinary talent for doing just that. I suspect you will also receive unexpected help and surprising grace as you proceed. Halloween costume suggestion: a snake molting its skin.


CAPRICORN

(Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
Speaking on behalf of your wild mind, I’m letting you know that you’re due for an immersion in revelry and festivity. Plugging away at business as usual could become counterproductive unless you take at least brief excursions to the frontiers of pleasure. High integrity may become sterile unless you expose it to an unpredictable adventure or two. Halloween costume suggestion: party animal, hell raiser, social butterfly, god or goddess of delight. Every one of us harbors a touch of crazy genius that periodically needs to be unleashed, and now is that time for you.

AQUARIUS
(Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
I hope you will choose a Halloween costume that emboldens you to feel powerful. For the next three weeks, it’s in your long-term interest to invoke a visceral sense of potency, dominion and sovereignty. What clothes and trappings might stimulate these qualities in you? Those of a king or queen? A rock star or CEO? A fairy godmother, superhero or dragon-tamer? Only you know which archetypal persona will help stir up your untapped reserves of confidence and command.


PISCES

(Feb. 19-March 20):
It’s time to stretch the boundaries, Pisces. You have license to expand the containers and outgrow the expectations and wage rebellion for the sheer fun of it. The frontiers are calling you. Your enmeshment in small talk and your attachment to trivial wishes are hereby suspended. Your mind yearns to be blown and blown and blown again! I dare you to wander outside your overly safe haven and go in quest of provocative curiosities. Halloween costume suggestion: mad scientist, wild-eyed revolutionary, Dr. Who.

Homework: What is your greatest fear? Make fun of it this Halloween. Tell me about it at FreeWillAstrology.com.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

Free Will Astrology

Free Will Astrology

 

ARIES
(March 21-April 19):
According to the online etymological dictionary, the verb “fascinate” entered the English language in the 16th century. It was derived from the Middle French fasciner and the Latin fascinatus, which are translated as “bewitch, enchant, put under a spell.” In the 19th century, “fascinate” expanded in meaning to include “delight, attract, hold the attention of.” I suspect you will soon have experiences that could activate both senses of “fascinate.” My advice is to get the most out of your delightful attractions without slipping into bewitchment. Is that even possible? It will require you to exercise fine discernment, but yes, it is.

 
TAURUS
(April 20-May 20):
One of the largest machines in the world is a “bucket wheel excavator” in Kazakhstan. It’s a saw that weighs 45,000 tons and has a blade the size of a four-story building. If you want to slice through a mountain, it’s perfect for the job. Indeed, that’s what it’s used for over in Kazakhstan. Right now, Taurus, I picture you as having a metaphorical version of this equipment. That’s because I think you have the power to rip open a clearing through a massive obstruction that has been in your way.

GEMINI
(May 21-June 20):
Filmmaker Alfred Hitchcock did a daily ritual to remind him of life’s impermanence. After drinking his tea each morning, he flung both cup and saucer over his shoulder, allowing them to smash on the floor. I don’t recommend that you adopt a comparable custom for long-term use, but it might be healthy and interesting to do so for now. Are you willing to outgrow and escape your old containers? Would you consider diverging from formulas that have always worked for you? Are there any unnecessary taboos that need to be broken? Experiment with the possible blessings that might come by not clinging to the illusion of “permanence.”  

CANCER
(June 21-July 22):
Terence was a comic playwright in ancient Rome. He spoke of love in ways that sound modern. It can be capricious and weird, he said. It may provoke indignities and rouse difficult emotions. Are you skilled at debate? Love requires you to engage in strenuous discussions. Peace may break out in the midst of war, and vice versa. Terence’s conclusion: If you seek counsel regarding the arts of love, you may as well be asking for advice on how to go mad. I won’t argue with him. He makes good points. But I suspect that in the coming weeks you will be excused from most of those crazy-making aspects. The sweet and smooth sides of love will predominate. Uplift and inspiration are more likely than angst and bewilderment. Take advantage of the grace period! Put chaos control measures in place for the next time Terence’s version of love returns.

LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22):
In the coming weeks, you will have a special relationship with the night. When the sun goes down, your intelligence will intensify, as will your knack for knowing what’s really important and what’s not. In the darkness, you will have an enhanced capacity to make sense of murky matters lurking in the shadows. You will be able to penetrate deeper than usual, and get to the bottom of secrets and mysteries that have kept you off-balance. Even your grimy fears may be transformable if you approach them with a passion for redemption.  

VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
New friends and unexpected teachers are in your vicinity, with more candidates on the way. There may even be potential comrades who could eventually become flexible collaborators and catalytic guides. Will you be available for the openings they offer? Will you receive them with fire in your heart and mirth in your eyes? I worry that you may not be ready if you are too preoccupied with old friends and familiar teachers. So please make room for surprises.

LIBRA
(Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
More than any other sign, you have an ability to detach yourself from life’s flow and analyze its complexities with cool objectivity. This is mostly a good thing. It enhances your power to make rational decisions. On the other hand, it sometimes devolves into a liability. You may become so invested in your role as observer that you refrain from diving into life’s flow. You hold yourself apart from it, avoiding both its messiness and vitality. But I don’t foresee this being a problem in the coming weeks. In fact, I bet you will be a savvy watcher even as you’re almost fully immersed in the dynamic flux.

SCORPIO
(Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
Are you an inventor? Is it your specialty to create novel gadgets and machines? Probably not. But in the coming weeks you may have metaphorical resemblances to an inventor. I suspect you will have an enhanced ability to dream up original approaches and find alternatives to conventional wisdom. You may surprise yourself with your knack for finding ingenious solutions to long-standing dilemmas. To prime your instincts, I’ll provide three thoughts from inventor Thomas Edison. 1. “To invent, you need a good imagination and a pile of junk.” 2. “Just because something doesn’t do what you planned it to do doesn’t mean it’s useless.” 3. “Everything comes to those who hustle while they wait.”

SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
Some unraveling is inevitable. What has been woven together must now be partially unwoven. But please refrain from thinking of this mysterious development as a setback. Instead, consider it an opportunity to reexamine and redo any work that was a bit hasty or sloppy. Be glad you will get a second chance to fix and refine what wasn’t done quite right the first time. In fact, I suggest you preside over the unraveling yourself. Don’t wait for random fate to accomplish it. And for best results, formulate an intention to regard everything that transpires as a blessing.

CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
“A waterfall would be more impressive if it flowed the other way,” said Irish author Oscar Wilde. I appreciate the wit, but don’t agree with him. A plain old ordinary waterfall, with foamy surges continually plummeting over a precipice and crashing below, is sufficiently impressive for me. What about you, Capricorn? In the coming days, will you be impatient and frustrated with plain old ordinary marvels and wonders? Or will you be able to enjoy them just as they are?

AQUARIUS
(Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
Years ago, I moved into a rental house with my new girlfriend, whom I had known for six weeks. As we fell asleep the first night, a song played in my head: “Nature’s Way”, by the band Spirit. I barely knew it and had rarely thought of it before. And yet there it was, repeating its first line over and over: “It’s nature’s way of telling you something’s wrong.” Being a magical thinker, I wondered if my unconscious mind was telling me a secret about my love. But I rejected that possibility; it was too painful to contemplate. When we broke up a few months later, however, I wished I had paid attention to that early alert. I mention this, Aquarius, because I suspect your unconscious mind will soon provide you with a wealth of useful information, not just through song lyrics but other subtle signals, as well. Listen up! At least some of it will be good news, not cautionary like mine.

PISCES
(Feb. 19-March 20):
When I advise you to GET NAKED, I don’t mean it in a literal sense. Yes, I will applaud if you’re willing to experiment with brave acts of self-revelation. I will approve of you taking risks for the sake of the raw truth. But getting arrested for indecent exposure might compromise your ability to carry out those noble acts. So, no, don’t actually take off all your clothes and wander through the streets. Instead, surprise everyone with brilliant acts of surrender and vulnerability. Gently and sweetly and poetically tell the Purveyors of Unholy Repression to take their boredom machine and shove it up their humdrum.

Send pictures of your favorite scarecrows or descriptions of your dreams of protection to me at Truthrooster@gmail.com.

 

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

Free Will Astrology

Free Will Astrology

 

ARIES
(March 21-April 19):
Here’s actor Bill Murray’s advice about relationships: “If you have someone that you think is The One, don’t just say, ‘OK, let’s pick a date. Let’s get married.’ Take that person and travel around the world. Buy a plane ticket for the two of you to go to places that are hard to go to and hard to get out of. And if, when you come back, you’re still in love with that person, get married at the airport.” In the coming weeks, Aries, I suggest you make comparable moves to test and deepen your own closest alliances. See what it’s like to get more seriously and deliriously intimate.

 
TAURUS
(April 20-May 20):
Some firefighters use a wetter kind of water than the rest of us. It contains a small amount of biodegradable foam that makes it 10 times more effective in dousing blazes. With this as your cue, I suggest you work on making your emotions “wetter” than usual. By that I mean the following: When your feelings arise, give them your reverent attention. Marvel at how mysterious they are. Be grateful for how much life force they endow you with. Whether they are relatively “negative” or “positive,” regard them as interesting revelations that provide useful information and potential opportunities for growth.

GEMINI
(May 21-June 20):
Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell is a BBC TV miniseries set in the early 19th century. It’s the fictional story of a lone wizard, Mr. Norrell, who seeks to revive the art of occult magic so as to accomplish practical works, like helping the English navy in its war against the French navy. Norrell is pleased to find an apprentice, Jonathan Strange, and draws up a course of study for him. Norrell tells Strange that the practice of magic is daunting, “but the study is a continual delight.” If you’re interested in taking on a similar challenge, Gemini, it’s available.

 
CANCER
(June 21-July 22):
We humans have put buttons on clothing for seven millennia. But for a long time these small knobs and disks were purely ornamental — meant to add beauty but not serve any other function. That changed in the 13th century, when our ancestors finally got around to inventing buttonholes. Buttons could then serve an additional purpose, providing a convenient way to fasten garments. I foresee the possibility of a comparable evolution in your personal life, Cancerian. You have an opening to dream up further uses for elements that have previously been one-dimensional. Brainstorm about how you might expand the value of familiar things.

LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22):
You would be wise to rediscover and revive your primal innocence. If you can figure out how to shed a few shreds of your sophistication and a few slivers of your excess dignity, you will literally boost your intelligence. That’s why I’m inviting you to explore the kingdom of childhood, where you can encounter stimuli that will freshen and sweeten your adulthood. Your upcoming schedule could include jumping in mud puddles, attending parties with imaginary friends, having uncivilized fun with wild toys, and drinking boisterously from fountains of youth.

 
VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
While still a young man, Virgo author Leo Tolstoy wrote that “I have not met one man who is morally as good as I am.” He lived by a strict creed. “Eat moderately” was one of his “rules of life,” along with “Walk for an hour every day.” Others were equally stern: “Go to bed no later than 10 o’clock,” “Only do one thing at a time,” and “Disallow flights of imagination unless necessary.” He did provide himself with wiggle room, however. One guideline allowed him to sleep two hours during the day. Another specified that he could visit a brothel twice a month. I’d love for you to be inspired by Tolstoy’s approach, Virgo. Now is a favorable time to revisit your own rules of life. As you refine and recommit yourself to these fundamental disciplines, be sure to give yourself enough slack.

LIBRA
(Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
Many astronomers believe that our universe began with the Big Bang. An inconceivably condensed speck of matter exploded, eventually expanding into thousands of billions of stars. It must have been a noisy event, right? Actually, no. Astronomers estimate that the roar of the primal eruption was just 120 decibels — less than the volume of a live rock concert. I suspect that you are also on the verge of your own personal Big Bang, Libra. It, too, will be relatively quiet for the amount of energy it unleashes.

SCORPIO
(Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
For now, you are excused from further work on the impossible tasks that have been grinding you down. You may take a break from the unsolvable riddles and cease your exhaustive efforts. And if you would also like to distance yourself from the farcical jokes the universe has been playing, go right ahead. To help enforce this transition, I hereby authorize you to enjoy a time of feasting and frolicking, which will serve as an antidote to your baffling trials. And I hereby declare that you have been as successful at weathering these trials as you could possibly be, even if the concrete proof of that is not yet entirely visible.

SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
One afternoon in September, I was hiking along a familiar path in the woods. As I passed my favorite grandmother oak, I spied a thick, 6-foot-long snake loitering on the trail in front of me. In hundreds of previous visits, I had never before seen a creature bigger than a mouse. The serpent’s tail was hidden in the brush, but its head looked more like a harmless gopher snake’s than a dangerous rattler’s. I took the opportunity to sing it three songs. It stayed for the duration, then slipped away after I finished. What a great omen! The next day, I made a tough but liberating decision to leave behind a good part of my life so as to focus more fully on a great part. With or without a snake sighting, Sagittarius, I foresee a comparable breakthrough for you sometime soon.

CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
Canadian author Margaret Atwood has finished a new manuscript. It’s called Scribbler Moon. But it won’t be published as a book until the year 2114. Until then, it will be kept secret, along with the texts of many other writers who are creating work for a “Future Library.” The project’s director is conceptual artist Katie Paterson, who sees it as a response to George Orwell’s question, “How could you communicate with the future?” With this as your inspiration, Capricorn, try this exercise: Compose five messages you would like to deliver to the person you will be in 2025.

AQUARIUS
(Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
Every hour of your life, millions of new cells are born to replace old cells that are dying. That’s why many parts of your body are composed of an entirely different collection of cells than they were years ago. If you are 35, for example, you have replaced your skeleton three times. Congratulations! Your creativity is spectacular, as is your ability to transform yourself. Normally these instinctual talents aren’t nearly as available to you in your efforts to recreate and transform your psyche, but they are now. In the coming months, you will have extraordinary power to revamp and rejuvenate everything about yourself, not just your physical organism.

PISCES
(Feb. 19-March 20):
The coming weeks will NOT be a favorable time to seek out allies you don’t even like that much or adventures that provide thrills you have felt a thousand times before. But the near future will be an excellent time to go on a quest for your personal version of the Holy Grail, a magic carpet, the key to the kingdom or an answer to the Sphinx’s riddle. In other words, Pisces, I advise you to channel your yearning toward experiences that steep your heart with a sense of wonder. Don’t bother with anything that degrades, disappoints or desensitizes you.

Homework: In what part of your life are you doing less than your best? Why? FreeWillAstrology.com.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

Free Will Astrology

Free Will Astrology

 

ARIES
(March 21-April 19):
If I warned you not to trust anyone, I hope you would reject my simplistic fear-mongering. If I suggested that you trust everyone unconditionally, I hope you would dismiss my delusional naiveté. But it’s important to acknowledge that the smart approach is far more difficult than those two extremes. You’ve got to evaluate each person and even each situation on a case-by-case basis. There may be unpredictable folks who are trustworthy some of the time, but not always. Can you be both affably open-hearted and slyly discerning? It’s especially important that you do so in the next 16 days.  

TAURUS
(April 20-May 20):
As I meditated on your astrological aspects, I had an intuition that I should go to a gem fair I’d heard about. It was at an event center near my home. When I arrived, I was dazzled to find a vast spread of minerals, fossils, gemstones and beads. Within a few minutes, two stones had commanded my attention as if they’d reached out to me telepathically: chrysoprase, a green gemstone, and petrified wood, a mineralized fossil streaked with earth tones. The explanatory note next to the chrysoprase said that if you keep this gem close to you, it “helps make conscious what has been unconscious.” Ownership of the petrified wood was described as conferring “the power to remove obstacles.” I knew these were the exact oracles you needed. I bought both stones, took them home and put them on an altar dedicated to your success in the coming weeks.

GEMINI
(May 21-June 20):
George R. R. Martin has written a series of fantasy novels collectively called A Song of Ice and Fire. They have sold 60 million copies and been adapted for the TV series Game of Thrones. Martin says the inspiration for his master work originated with the pet turtles he owned as a kid. The creatures lived in a toy castle in his bedroom, and he pretended they were knights and kings and other royal characters. “I made up stories about how they killed each other and betrayed each other and fought for the kingdom,” he has testified. I think the next seven months will be a perfect time for you to make a comparable leap, Gemini. What’s your version of Martin’s turtles? And what valuable asset can you turn it into?  

CANCER
(June 21-July 22):
The editors of the Urban Dictionary provide a unique definition of the word “outside.” They say it’s a vast, uncomfortable place that surrounds your home. It has no ceiling or walls or carpets, and contains annoying insects and random loud noises. There’s a big yellow ball in the sky that’s always moving around and changing the temperature in inconvenient ways. Even worse, the “outside” is filled with strange people who are constantly doing deranged and confusing things. Does this description match your current sense of what “outside” means, Cancerian? If so, that’s OK. For now, enjoy the hell out of being inside.

LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22):
We all go through phases when we are tempted to believe in the factuality of every hostile, judgmental and random thought that our monkey minds generate. I am not predicting that this is such a time for you. But I do want to ask you to be extra skeptical toward your monkey mind’s fabrications. Right now it’s especially important that you think as coolly and objectively as possible. You can’t afford to be duped by anyone’s crazy talk, including your own. Be extra vigilant in your quest for the raw truth.  

VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
Do you know about the ancient Greek general Pyrrhus? At the Battle of Asculum in 279 BCE, his army technically defeated Roman forces, but his casualties were so substantial that he ultimately lost the war. You can and you must avoid a comparable scenario. Fighting for your cause is good only if it doesn’t wreak turmoil and bewilderment. If you want to avoid an outcome in which both sides lose, you’ve got to engineer a result in which both sides win. Be a cagey compromiser.

LIBRA
(Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
If I could give you a birthday present, it would be a map to your future treasure. Do you know which treasure I’m referring to? Think about it as you fall asleep on the next eight nights. I’m sorry I can’t simply provide you with the instructions you’d need to locate it. The cosmic powers tell me you have not yet earned that right. The second-best gift I can offer, then, will be clues about how to earn it. Clue #1. Meditate on the differences between what your ego wants and what your soul needs. #2. Ask yourself, “What is the most unripe part of me?” and then devise a plan to ripen it. #3. Invite your deep mind to give you insights you haven’t been brave enough to work with until now. #4. Take one medium-sized bold action every day.

SCORPIO
(Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
Galway Kinnell’s poem “Middle of the Way” is about his solo trek through the snow on Oregon’s Mount Gauldy. As he wanders in the wilderness, he remembers an important truth about himself: “I love the day, the sun . . . But I know [that] half my life belongs to the wild darkness.” According to my reading of the astrological omens, Scorpio, now is a good time for you, too, to refresh your awe and reverence for the wild darkness — and to recall that half your life belongs to it. Doing so will bring you another experience Kinnell describes: “an inexplicable sense of joy, as if some happy news had been transmitted to me directly, by-passing the brain.”

SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
The last time I walked into a McDonald’s and ordered a meal was 1984. Nothing that the restaurant chain serves up is appealing to my taste or morality. I do admire its adaptability, however. In cow-loving India, McDonald’s only serves vegetarian fare that includes deep-fried cheese and potato patties. In Israel, kosher McFalafels are available. Mexicans order their McMuffins with refried beans and pico de gallo. At a McDonald’s in Singapore, you can order McRice burgers. This is the type of approach I advise for you right now, Sagittarius. Adjust your offerings for your audience.

CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
You have been flirting with your “alone at the top” reveries. I won’t be surprised if one night you have a dream of riding on a Ferris wheel that malfunctions, leaving you stranded at the highest point. What’s going on? Here’s what I suspect: In one sense you are zesty and farseeing. Your competence and confidence are waxing. At the same time, you may be out of touch with what’s going on at ground level. Your connection to the depths is not as intimate as your relationship with the heights. The moral of the story might be to get in closer contact with your roots. Or be more attentive to your support system. Or buy new shoes and underwear.

AQUARIUS
(Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
I haven’t planted a garden for years. My workload is too intense to devote enough time to that pleasure. So eight weeks ago I was surprised when a renegade sunflower began blooming in the dirt next to my porch. How did the seed get there? Via the wind? A passing bird that dropped a potential meal? The gorgeous interloper eventually grew to a height of four feet and produced a boisterous yellow flower head. Every day I muttered a prayer of thanks for its guerrilla blessing. I predict a comparable phenomenon for you in the coming days, Aquarius.

PISCES
(Feb. 19-March 20):
The coming days will be a favorable time to dig up what has been buried. You can, if you choose, discover hidden agendas, expose deceptions, see beneath the masks and dissolve delusions. But it’s my duty to ask you this: Is that really something you want to do? It would be fun and sexy to liberate so much trapped emotion and suppressed energy, but it could also stir up a mind-bending ruckus that propels you on a healing quest. I hope you decide to go for the gusto, but I’ll understand if you prefer to play it safe.

Homework: Send testimonies about how you’ve redeemed the dark side to: Sex Laugh, uaregod@comcast.net.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

Free Will Astrology

Free Will Astrology

 

ARIES
(March 21-April 19):
The next seven weeks will NOT be a favorable time to fool around with psychic vampires and charismatic jerks. I recommend you avoid the following mistakes as well: failing to protect the wounded areas of your psyche; demanding perfection from those you care about; and trying to fulfill questionable desires that have led you astray in the past. Now I’ll name some positive actions you’d be wise to consider: hunting for skillful healers who can relieve your angst and aches; favoring the companionship of people who are empathetic and emotionally intelligent; and getting educated about how to build the kind of intimacy you can thrive on.

 
TAURUS
(April 20-May 20):
You may have seen websites that offer practical tips on how to improve your mastery of life’s little details. They tell you how to de-clutter your home, or how to keep baked goods from going stale, or why you should shop for shoes at night to get the best fit. I recently coame across a humorous site that provides the opposite: bad life tips. For instance, it suggests that you make job interviews less stressful by only applying for jobs you don’t want. Put your laptop in cold water to prevent overheating. To save time, brush your teeth while you eat. In the two sets of examples I’ve just given, it’s easy to tell the difference between which tips are trustworthy and which aren’t. But in the coming days, you might find it more challenging to distinguish between the good advice and bad advice you’ll receive. Be very discerning.

GEMINI
(May 21-June 20):
On a windy afternoon last spring I was walking through a quiet neighborhood in Berkeley. In one yard there was a garden plot filled with the young green stems of as-yet unidentifiable plants. Anchored in their midst was a small handwritten sign. Its message seemed to be directed not at passers-by like me but at the sprouts themselves. “Grow faster, you little bastards!” the sign said — as if the blooming things might be bullied into ripening. I hope you’re smart enough not to make similar demands on yourself and those you care about, Gemini. It’s not even necessary. I suspect that everything in your life will just naturally grow with vigor in the coming weeks.  

 
CANCER
(June 21-July 22):
“I am rooted, but I flow,” wrote Virginia Woolf in her novel The Waves. That paradoxical image reminds me of you right now. You are as grounded as a tree and as fluid as a river. Your foundation is deep and strong, even as you are resilient in your ability to adapt to changing circumstances. This is your birthright as a Cancerian! Enjoy and use the blessings it confers. (P.S. If for some strange reason you’re not experiencing an exquisite version of what I’ve described, there must be some obstacle you are mistakenly tolerating. Get rid of it.)

LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22):
Should I offer my congratulations? You have corralled a gorgeous mess of problems that are more interesting and provocative than everyone else’s. It’s unclear how long this odd good fortune will last, however. So I suggest you act decisively to take maximum advantage of the opportunities that your dilemmas have cracked open. If anyone can turn the heartache of misplaced energy into practical wisdom, you can. If anyone can harness chaos to drum up new assets, it’s you. Is it possible to be both cunning and conscientious, both strategic and ethical? For you right now, I think it is.

 
VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
Let’s say you have walked along the same path or driven down the same road a thousand times. Then, one day, as you repeat your familiar route, a certain object or scene snags your attention for the first time. Maybe it’s a small fountain or a statue of the Buddhist goddess Guanyin or a wall with graffiti that says, “Crap happens, but so does magic.” It has always been there. You’ve been subconsciously aware of it. But at this moment, for unknown reasons, it finally arrives in your conscious mind. I believe this is an apt metaphor for your life in the next week. More than once, you will suddenly tune in to facts, situations or influences that had previously been invisible to you. That’s a good thing! But it might initially bring a jolt.

LIBRA
(Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
The 20th century’s most influential artist may have been Pablo Picasso. He created thousands of paintings and was still churning them out when he was 91 years old. A journalist asked him which one was his favorite. “The next one,” he said. I suggest you adopt a similar attitude in the coming weeks, Libra. What you did in the past is irrelevant. You should neither depend on nor be weighed down by anything that has come before. For now, all that matters are the accomplishments and adventures that lie ahead of you.

SCORPIO
(Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
A windbreak is a line of stout trees or thick bushes that provides shelter from the wind. I think you need a metaphorical version: someone or something to shield you from a relentless force that has been putting pressure on you; a buffer zone or protected haven where you can take refuge from a stressful barrage that has been hampering your ability to act with clarity and grace. Do you know what you will have to do to get it? Here’s your battle cry: “I need sanctuary! I deserve sanctuary!”

SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
Your fellow Sagittarian Walt Disney accomplished a lot. He was a pioneer in the art of animation and made movies that won numerous Academy Awards. He built theme parks, created an entertainment empire and amassed fantastic wealth. Why was he so successful? In part because he had high standards, worked hard and harbored an obsessive devotion to his quirky vision. If you aspire to cultivate any of those qualities, now is a favorable time to raise your mastery to the next level. Disney had one other trait you might consider working on: He liked to play the game of life by his own rules. For example, his favorite breakfast was doughnuts dipped in Scotch whisky. What would be your equivalent?

CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
October is Fix the Fundamentals Month. It will be a favorable time to substitute good habits for bad habits. You will attract lucky breaks and practical blessings as you work to transform overwrought compulsions into rigorous passions. You will thrive as you seek to discover the holy yearning that’s hidden at the root of devitalizing addictions. To get started, instigate free-wheeling experiments that will propel you out of your sticky rut and in the direction of a percolating groove.


AQUARIUS

(Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
Have you made your travel plans yet? Have you plotted your escape? I hope you will hightail it to a festive playground where some of your inhibitions will shrink, or else journey to a holy spot where your spiritual yearnings will ripen. What would be even better would be a pilgrimage to a place that satisfied both of those agendas — filled up your senses with novel enticements and fed your hunger for transcendent insights. Off you go, Aquarius! Why aren’t you already on your way? If you can’t manage a real getaway in the near future, please at least stage a jailbreak for your imagination.

PISCES
(Feb. 19-March 20):
Pablo Neruda’s Book of Questions consists entirely of 316 questions. It’s one of those rare texts that makes no assertions and draws no conclusions. In this spirit, and in honor of the sphinxlike phase you’re now passing through, I offer you six pertinent riddles: 1. What is the most important thing you have never done? 2. How could you play a joke on your fears? 3. Identify the people in your life who have made you real to yourself. 4. Name a good old thing you would have to give up in order to get a great new thing. 5. What’s the one feeling you want to feel more than any other in the next three years?. 6. What inspires you to love?

Homework: Send testimonies about how you’ve redeemed the dark side to: Sex Laugh, uaregod@comcast.net.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

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